A Teacher — Through Life

Tova Mesika, Ramat Beit Shemesh

About 25 years ago, I was in sixth grade. This wasn’t your typical elementary school — Rav Chaim Mintz of Oorah convinced me to switch from public school to this “kiruv school,” which meant that the students who went there weren’t frum while the teachers and staff were all shomrei Torah u’mitzvos.

It was hard to balance home and school. At school we learned about Shabbos and kashrus and tzniyus. At home we’d watch TV.

Our teachers tried to show us how beautiful Yiddishkeit was, but it wasn’t easy. One of our teachers, Ms. Shani Shaffren, would invite two girls at a time to sleep over and spend the whole Shabbos with her and her family. Those Shabbosim were a lot of fun. I loved hearing her family sing zemiros and eating the yummy seudah with them.

We were a “lively” sixth grade bunch, often getting into fights at recess time. So Ms. Shaffren decided she would bring games and play with us. Yes — she’d play Taboo with us during her break.

One day she bought a poster with the words RIP I CAN’T. She told us to write down all the things we felt we couldn’t do. Then we threw the papers into a can and burned them. She’d teach us quotes like, “I know I’m special cuz G-d don’t make no junk.”

One Purim I asked my mom to drive me to Ms. Shaffren because she had a shalach manos for me. I was so happy to get it — it was the only shalach manos I got! When I flew to Israel for the summer, Ms. Shaffren sent me a letter in the mail. It felt so amazing getting a letter from my teacher! I remember it saying “Give the Kotel a kiss for me.”

We kept in touch. When I was 16 years old, I went to her wedding. (Even after she was married, and technically Mrs. Greenfield, I still called her Ms. Shaffren.) The couple moved to the Lower East Side where their Shabbos table was full of guests. I was always invited and loved going there.

From New York, they made aliyah to Jerusalem. When I got to Neve, I became a bat bayit in their home, bringing all my seminary friends to them for Shabbos. When I got engaged, Ms. Shaffren made my l’chayim in her home. Ms. Shaffren visited me when I had my first baby and came to all of our brissim.

When my mother became sick and passed away, Ms. Shaffren was at her levayah. The Shabbos after the funeral, I gave birth to my fourth child and was in the hospital. Her husband showed up there with bags and bags of food that she’d made me —  there was so much cake, I had to distribute it to all the other yoldot.

When my sixth child wasn’t gaining weight, Ms. Shaffren got her father involved, and baruch Hashem the baby is now fine. Thank you, Dr. Shaffren!

Ms. Shaffren — you will forever be my role model and teacher for life. Thank you for everything!

Your student, Natalie (aka your favorite person)